Running cures what ails me

I have been so out of sorts lately. It started out as being a little down. Then it turned into not doing things I used to enjoy. I even started having some cigarette puffs while I was drinking. That's not good. Not eating well. Eating junk. 

Then I started hating. Hating people. Hating things. Everything and everybody was pissing me off.

I was even feeling sorry for myself. I'm not good at anything. Everybody does everything better than me. I wanted to do the half marathon in October and failed miserable at my training. I know it's my own fault for making excuses, but I made them. I was even trying to put myself out there, to get to know other runners in the area. And got stomped on. Twice. 

I knew I was in a funk and it was getting worse. I was trying to figure my way out. I was actually this bad this time last year too. Last year I went to my Dr for some "medicine". I still have some if I need some, but I'd like to try and do this without.

I thought I'd finally sign up for a race. 10K in the Valley. I was hoping that if I had something to look forward to, I might get my ass in gear again. Nope. Now, I've just wasted $50.00 

This last week I was just plain nasty. Cranky. Nasty. Say rude things and not care who I hurt, nasty. That is so not me. 

I woke up this morning and decided today was the day. I had to get my sanity back. I didn't know how I was going to do it, but I was going to do something. Smart Coach said I have to run 3 miles today. It's not crazy hot out. Hopefully I won't be exhausted when I get home. I won't be. I'll have a cup of coffee at 3 pm. That should keep me going until I can get a run in.

I got home. I made supper. And then Pat and I went out for a 3.5 mile run.

I didn't realize how much I needed that. I actually haven't felt this mentally good in weeks. I know. I know. It's the endorphins. But I'll take whatever I can get at this point. And probably the caffeine. 

I'm going to try and keep up with the running. Knowing that it might help with the mental me, might give me the push I need. I'm not feeling so bad about the 10K in the Valley. I will do it. And I will do the 10K in Moncton at the end of October too. I know I will be ready. Ready to finish anyway. 

So that's my little sob story for the evening. I don't have any pictures to post. It's 11pm and I'm tired. I'll post my September stats tomorrow as well.

Good night.